Developer: Western Technologies, Inc.
Size: 16 megs
No. of players: 1
Got it for: $4.90, complete.
deep breath and....every villain that Spidey has ever caught has escaped
from the Ravencroft asylum and is now, of course, trying to take their
revenge on our friendly neighborhood Spider-Man, so he'll have to run
all around New York in order to beat the living piss out of each and
every one of them in yet another attempt to save the city. I feel dizzy...
What's it all about?
a sidescrolling action title that has Spidey all over New
York trying to round up everyone that escaped
from the asylum. Each level has you running, jumping, crawling
and swinging your spider-ass off, trying to either kill or just
avoid the hordes of assorted unknown
minor villains and hopelessly mediocre super villains....and I
do mean hordes. The
game should have been called "Cheap-ass Spider-Man Boss Simulator".
like the team said “Man, we sure liked how they sent out multiple
bosses to kill you in Maximum Carnage,
let’s do that but
make it a sidescroller”. In terms of Spidey's fighting abilities,
on top of punches and kicks he now sports an assortment of grenades(!?)
that you'll be forced to save for boss fights...if you can make
it to them. The level design in the game
was built using a new technique called "fucking disgraceful"...I
think you're going to like how it turned out.
you've got these inane "sewer" sections. Basically you're just
running around a level, you fall in a hole and you're suddenly in the city's
sewer system. What's interesting about that: NO MATTER WHAT LEVEL YOU'RE
ON, IF YOU FALL IN A HOLE IT'S THE SAME SEWER. The purpose of it, I'm guessing,
is to refill your items and life bar, but it turns out being a huge fuck
bucket as they throw *three* bosses at you at once, while you're trying
to pick this stuff up. What's
a spider to do? Well, taking a cue from the Acclaim Spider-Man series(Maximum
Carnage and Separation Anxiety),
if you're lucky enough
to find a "helper" icon(I was...ONCE in the entire game) you can call
out a member of the "Fantastic" Four. They show up, do nothing, then
leave. It's wonderful.
boils down to two things: Either knowing where you need to go,
at which point you can get there by just running past all the enemies
in, like, two minutes....or not knowing where you need to go. If
you're like the other 99.9% of the gaming populace and *don't*
know where you need to go it can take forever and a day to finish
the given level(the "correct" path is just unbelievably
hard to find at times).
must have sat there for twenty minutes trying to figure out what
they fuck they wanted me to do on the third level. There's just
simply no indication on what they want you to use to get to certain
- Character graphics are really well animated, colorful,
detailed and all that. Everyone just looks outstanding in terms of
art and design, it really brings in a sense of style to the game.
The environments are also knockouts, especially places such as the
"Mean Streets" level where you’re
on some sort of bridge and you’ve got parallax scrolling clouds,
water, street, etc. Pretty nice effect. Also, the last level(Ravenwood)
has some really cool lighting effects where Spidey will go in and
out of the light, slightly changing colors and whatnot; there’s
even some slick, faked transparency going on.
- Mediocre in every way, shape and form. Sound effects are
generic and scratchy, the music is bland and boring. About the only
thing of note in the entire sound dept. would be the Coney Island
BGM, which has actual Three Stooges sound bytes in it...I
shit you not.
- Sluggish as fuck. Most stuff seems to come off a second
or two after you do it, or not at all. Ducking is the worst:
You press down, sometimes Spidey ducks...most times he just sort
of stands there. Attacking is just about the same, and as most
enemies(and pretty much all bosses) don't seem to show any signs
of taking damage you just have to guess as to whether you've
hit them or not. Adding to the frustration is one of the game's
key ingredients to getting around a level: Jumping. It's fucked.
He does these high-ass leaps but barely moves forward at all...so
you end up getting these jumps that shoot your ass WAY up in
the air only to come back down to the ground a mere three inches
from where you left it. Finally, to top it off you're really
only allowed to swing from or crawl on certain surfaces....and
because of this, you just sort of run around and jump up to a
wall while praying it's one of the pre-determined
few you can actually latch on to(via web or your hands/feet).
Let me tell you, on levels with death pits that's a whole lotta
- Difficulty is through the roof thanks to the cheap-ass
AI and the fact that they just pop up on the screen most
of the time. You'll be running through a level, then all of the sudden
sort of magically appears in front of you, you touch them, they hurt
you, then they run for it. No shit, they really make a run for it!
So, of course, you chase the fuckers down only to have them suddenly
stop, at which point you touch them, they hurt you, then they run
for it(again). It's infuriating to say the least. Now, as if that's
not enough they also respawn the *second* they are off the screen...it's
almost like you've been teleported back to 1985 and your buddy is
handing you the NES controller. Then,
and this is just the cherry on this cake of awesomeness, the
with cheap deaths. We're talking one hit kills and death pits, and
they're all over the place without any warning.
value - Low. The sluggish control mixed with the bullshit
AI make Spidey a bad play. If I had a choice between being shot in
the crotch with one of those bean-bag shotguns, or playing this game
again...I'd go ahead and take the bean-bag shotgun option, and ask
that they also pack it with rock salt for that extra "umph".
for better gaming experiences:
play it! If you must play it though...
you can back enemies into a corner, your crouching kick will actually juggle
them and you can kill most in as little as two hits.
of your kicks are WAY more powerful than the various punches. So,
if you jump kick someone it’s like punching them six times
or something. In short: Always kick!
time you jump, just hold down the kick button and Spidey will
keep kicking in the air(it's like it’s on turbo). Believe
it or not, this will generally get you past most enemies...even
if it's just making you fly past them rather than taking them
strategy? Grenade the fuck out of them until they die. Do not
approach them, definitely do not attempt to punch them...stand
back, throw grenades. You run out of grenades, shoot webbing.
You run out of that, attempt to jump kick them to death(good
luck on that last option, you'll need it).
Start with 10 lives: BE7A-RADA
rating: 35(out of 100) - Solid graphics, great animation,
mediocre control and crap gameplay. If you are just super hard up
for Spider-Man action, I guess it’s
kind of ok to go through the game once with the unlimited lives or
can handle. If not, just stick with the excellent Genesis, 32X and/or
Sega CD versions...you're not missing anything here.
Spider-Puss used his webbing to jack my turkey-dog right out of the bun,
and screamed this before leaving: Son of a bitch, another
fucking shitty, non-Sega made Spider-Man game? You know that no one
else seems to get it right, stop subjecting me to this shit!
the length on the web, that's the *MAXIMUM LENGTH* you can swing
Lizard, Morbius(I think) and some sort of blob = A good time
for Armored Spidey in the
Scorpion, no one ever takes him seriously...
us give thanks to the ebay snipers:
I have tried and tried to get this game off ebay, and each time(thankfully)
I lost to the gang of snipers who just seem to hang out waiting for this
piece of shit to show up. I don’t
understand how this constantly goes for $40+ every time. If I'd
of paid that...I think I'd of just shoot myself in the throat two minutes
after turning it on(kind of like I almost did after only paying $5 for