RGVS: My neighborhood since 1997, full of friends, source of countless bits of help and, of course, HARDCORE SLAMMING! Without further pause, I give to you...

Memorable Quotes from rec.games.video.sega

All Quotes are in their original form, misspellings, idiocy and all.
I have started including quotes from our sister-group, alt.sega.genesis as well as alt.games.video.sega-dreamcast and alt.games.video.sega-saturn.
New quotes are added whenever I see them, they will always be added to the bottom of the list.
The RGVS All Stars are listed at the bottom of the page.
I am still missing a few of the author's names for the postings, so if you see one that belongs to you or one where you can identify the poster, please let me know and I will credit them.

I've added in some music for your trip down memory lane. If you're not into it, just turn it off.
For those curious, it's a midi interpretation of Sonic 3D Blast's"Rusty Ruins Act 1" bgm. Originally by Richard Jaques, midi-ized by Amberle Elessedil.
>> Tekken stinx? WHAAAAAAAT! Your smokin somthing!

No, Tekken does suck. Thats my opinion. The characters are ugly, the moves are uninspiring. The combo's are stale. What fun is there in pounding in a ten button configuration and then watching the combo execute itself? I thought gameplay was about timing and execution, not "Please enter combo now. . . I'm sorry you have entered an invalid combo. Please insert more coins and try your combo again."

Mountain Dew Geist
"Use stonewheels for best results." - Joe and Mac
From the Joe and Mac Instruction Book, from the Wacky Game Quotes thread.
Nick Rox and SF Alpha:
But, hey, that's part of the job, if you write something that you know a particular group won't like, you better learn to reap what you have sowed. And, in Nick's case, he just seems to be asking for it, I mean, come on, Blue Shadows? "Yeah, the framerate is higher, the game plays better and the characters are slightly bigger, but, the blue shadows are simply blue tinted, and that makes the game simply unplayable, buy a Playstation. (Oh, BTW, please don't change the music to original and find out how wrong I am)" If that's not a cry for help, I don't know what is.

Greg - Editor - Gaming Enthusiast Online

Pic by John Allegrezza

>> SEGA SUCKS, it's got no good games anymore!

Excuse me, but would you be offended if I told you to fuck off, and crawl back under your rock and die?
The above is the opinion of: SCORPION!
  0 -- GET OVER HERE!!         0
 / |==o-------------------------------------------------->/\
/  |                 / \
  /\                /\
  / \                / \
See you in Hell punk!!

>> Doom on Saturn sucks, so does Saturn!

yawn, In the exact same way that Cruisin' proves that the N64 is crap? Or the same way that XTreme Games proves how bad the PSX is? And why does the existance of better games (such as Powerslave, which shows that Doom's fault is crappy programming) not matter to your "logic"? Get a grip moron, and I don't mean on your anatomy.

David Oldridge

PSX stands for Penis Sucking Xperts

>> I'd like to know why Gamefan never reviewed, one of the best games ever; "Iron Storm". Maybe it was a bit too deep for them? What do you want from guys that get all bonery over Crash. I believe it was because WD gave up all support for GameFan after that Lunar fiasco. You know, advertisments, demo games, etc. Vic, care to comment?

Correct. However, we didn't stop them from reviewing or commenting on the game AFTER it was released (when they could just BUY it). They did this for Dragon Force with the Japanese version. I think the reason they passed over the best Strategy game of 1996 (as other mags have attested) is that they don't "freak on military sims like those jap bastards." (Shouldn't that be the Gamefan motto, now?) :)

DBTH - Vic
Comment: Atta boy Vic, get'em!
For the actual article that started that whole thing, click here.(picture borrowed from Fatbabies)
GameFan Bias:
And I wasn't saying everybody at Gamefan was biased towards the PSX, just Nick. I'm sure he doesn't hate the Saturn (you don't have to hate the Saturn to be biased against it), but merely loves his PSX much more. However, that yields the same result as hating the Saturn - He always is very hard on the games, and even when he gives them good marks, he HAS to put in little comments to bring it down a little. ie, sudden yearning for remixed music when it never bothered him before, snide remarks about how this is fantastic - on the Saturn at least, etc. I'm glad he's not reviewing as many games in the mag. - kevin
>> NINTENDO rocks.
If you like sega consoles,
then you're a fuckin CRACKHEAD!
You fat lazy overweight govn't support pigs.

Let's play word scramble! Hmmmm...........Ah, here we go.....
sega rocks.
If you like govn't support pigs consoles,
then you're a fuckin fat lazy overweight NINTENDO CRACKHEAD!
I like that a lot more! Let's play again sometime.

Yes, that is me, when I was using Gloworm as my Username.

U.S. CyberBots Cancelled?
I don't like the way this is going....the day the Saturn starts to lose support of Capcom is the day I buy a PSX to play 2D games (ha ha! just kidding!).


>> Is Saturn better than PSX?
>> In what ways??

I've seen only one PSX game that I want to play that hasn't been ported over to the Saturn, for one. And Virtua Fighter has, does, and always will blow Tekken out of the water when it comes to style and gameplay. Saturn has the better load time of the two. If nothing else, the aesthetic design of the machines themselves. Compared to the Saturn, PSX is butt ugly. Need I say more?

Mario Manganiello

I like good pics and I hate gamefan<snicker>.
This coensides with the departure of Takuhi, who admitted himself to be GF's biggestSaturn fan. He left in the same issue GF declared Sony to be the next-gen leader. - Dr. Cossack
>> Thank you, yes! Someone actually sticking up for GameFan!
Net Newz: From Around the World of Gaming

Netty, you're relatively new around here, so I'll let you in on a secret. Having Sammael stick up for Gamefan probably isn't that great. Just do a search on his posts. If anything, it only reinforces Gamefan's status as a Sony pro magazine.
Greg - Editor Gaming Enthusiast Online
>> Thank God there are abusive people like you to set us straight.
My heart bleeds for you..
Watch alot of Opra?

No, but I watch a lot of Oprah...

Lee4Deal Wishes to sell his Yellow Ass for $7 with shipping included.

Charles Doane
Ah Lee4Deal, does anyone remember that guy? It was like an epidemic, the amount of people who got their asses jacked by him.
In the year of MARIO, Nineteen-hundred and ninety-six, The Mario Monks(may they be forever blessed) in an attempt to cease the growing tide of 32-bit unorthodoxy, heresy and hedonism, began a quest to enlighten the unbelievers and educate the video game masses. They did not succeed. It was therefore decided, in the year of MARIO, Nineteen-hundred and ninety-seven, that stronger measures were necessary. Thus began the HOLY INQUISITION of The Mario Monks or INQUISITION64.

Below is a transcript of the first inquisition conducted. The subject was a delusional 32-bit PSX game known as "Beyond the Beyond". It claimed that Sony(cursed is that name)could provide top-notch quality software and that it was indeed, such a game. And lo, The Mario Monks decreed that the game be subject to Mario's boundless mercy.

Herein lie the events as they occurred:

Inquisitor: You are "Beyond the Beyond"?
BTB: Yes.
Inquisitor: Thou claimest to have hours of fabulous game play yet thou dost not. For this, canst thou account?
BTB: I can! Sony has...
Inquisitor[cracks his whip]: MARIO is thy master! Answer thou mine question, or face MARIO's mercy!
BTB: I...I...
Inquisitor: CANST THOU ACCOUNT!!?!!
BTB: ...no... I cannot.
Inquisitor: It is said that RPGs such as thou should have grand endings, yet thou hath no such. Canst thou not account for this too?
BTB: No...
Inquisitor: Art thou justified in costing fifty of the great dollars???
BTB: I am not.
Inquisitor: Beyond the Beyond...thou art truly overrated. Yet MARIO is not unforgiving. I shall now grant ye absolution.
BTB: Oh, Oh thank you!!
Inquisitor: Dost thou renounce Sony and Sega, in all it's forms?
BTB: I do.
Inquisitor: Dost thou relinquish the bits-of-32?
BTB: I do.
Inquisitor: Wislt thou swear to stop full motion video skipping from now on?
BTB: I will.
Inquisitor: I now pronounce thee absolved. Release him of his burden.
The Beyond the Beyond source code was removed and deleted.

May MARIO bless you all!

The Mario Monks

GameFan and Doom64:
No I think the point they're making is that Doom regardless of what system it's on is still the same bullshit Space Marine blowing up the same devil worshipping dead things. But then again this is Nintendo 64, so all Satanic themes have probably been removed and replaced with something a little more feasible like "Evil alien scourge" or "The system" or some likely bullshit. And next is "Duke Nuetered 64"!!! Where when you start the level Duke shouts, "Those alien son-of-a-guns are gonna pay for blowing up my ride!" and later, "I'll rip off your head and have a number two down your throat!" I hope my point was clear there, the Nintendo 64 bashing was absolutely free of charge.

Mountain Dew Geist

I came up with the idea for this while reading the Nintendo newsgroup and listening
to the radio at the same time. Enjoy. :)

The N64 Song (sung to the tune of "If It Makes You Happy" by Sheryl Crow)
Games are a long, a long way from here
Grabbed the Nintendo, stuck in Mario, and played till I was nauseous again
We been searchin' through retail jungles
Found a dozen controllers
Turok and Hangtime
And Mario Kart 64
Well OK, I made this up
But I promise you I'll never give up
If it makes us happy, it can't be that bad
If it makes us happy, then why the Hell are we so mad?
Logged on, to get the lowdown
Listened to Next Gen, had a conniption
Well who hasn't been there before?
Games comin' round, around the long way
Pretty soon we'll see Doom
Starfox comes out in June
And Zelda could be out this year
Well OK, I'll still have fun
Just wake me up when Metroid is done
If it makes us happy, it can't be that bad
If the games look snappy, who cares if choices are this bad?
If it makes us happy, it can't be that bad
It it makes us happy, then why the Hell are we so mad?
Games are far, far away from here
Fly to Nintendo, grab Miyamoto
And tie him to his workstation chair
Well OK, they'll be along
So what if right now everything's gone?
If it makes us happy, it can't be that bad
If it makes us happy, then why the Hell are we so mad?
If it makes us happy...

- Bill (a loyal N64 owner :)

>> If it does drop does this mean Sega Saturn is in "discontinued mode", where any new Sega Saturn CD's will not be developed????

You mean like the Playstation and N64 are in "discontinued mode" with their price cuts? (Insert joke here about how the game selection for the N64 has been perilously close to "discontinued mode" ever since it shipped...)


Resistence is Futile:
For it has been written, those who have foresaken the almighty SEGA......heed this warning, or face eternal videogame mediocrity. SEGA has spoken...and the word of SEGA will be all that is now. I have been instructed to begin SEGA's divine plan of mass assimilation. Come now, gather 'round my words of wisdom....before it is too late for your videogame soul. Listen to SEGA's words and repent. - King of all Devils

Thou shalt bow down before thy master, SEGA, and repent your sins of videogame unrighteousness.
I bow down before my master, SEGA. I repent my sins of videogame unrighteousness.
Thou aren't worthy to be brought back into SEGA's midst.
I am not worthy of eternal gameplay bliss. I have foresaken all that is SEGA. I have followed the false prophets and have ignored all that is righteous.
Thou shalt make an offering of repentence. What shall thy offering be?
I shall forsake all that is SONY. I shall foresake all that is NINTENDO.
Prepare sinner, to make your sacrifice.
I send into eternal damnation all that is SONY. (SINNER turns Platstation upside down on the sacrificial alter) I forsake skipping FMV. (SINNER grabs hold of the staff of videogame righteousness) I forsake poor design and overheating. (SINNER crushes the useless machine with the staff of videogame righteousness) I send into eternal damnation all that is NINTENDO. (SINNER puts the N64 on the sacrificial alter) I forsake quality before quantity, for it has all been deceit and lies. (SINNER grabs hold of the staff of videogame righteousness) I forsake the Mario Monks, for they have been speaking in tongues and are evil. (SINNER crushes the useless machine with the staff of videogame righteousness)
Go now, SINNER, and enter the wilderness of eternal despair. Go there now for forty days and forty nights. Upon many nights of videogame soul searching, SEGA may find it in its glorious mercy to give you a second chance at videogame righteousness. Go now...and do not return until you are summoned...
I'm still wondering about that version of Tomb Raider 64 that Herman McClain was boasting about. I can see it now, the whole screen would be completely fogged in with a postage stamp size playing area :)


Videogamespot had a preview of the *Saturn* title Dead or Alive yesterday on their site. It was littered with the typical crap about how the Saturn would be lucky to get a halfway decent conversion out of a Model 2 game. Now this I can live with because the Model 2 is quite a bit more powerful than the current crop of consoles and, well, VGS is a pretty gay site and you have to expect this kind of crap from something related to EGM. You can also forget about them hearing about the positive feedback the demo got at the Tokyo Game Show since that would be actual news.


Warp's Kenji Eno will talk with Sega execs later today about bringing his recently canned M2 product and sequel, D2 to Sega's next generation console. He wrote off the M2 in a statement this morning, saying that "If Matsushita were a train traveling from point A to point B, they stopped in the middle and derailed."

In other words Urban Champion for my NES is a warranted game 'cause I can't actually duke it out with West Side Story street thugs whilst lil' grannies drop flower pots on my head from windows above for no good reason. Really, when was the last time any of us shoved a punk into a manhole? I can't actually vaporize baddies with my space-ship vacuum cleaner a la Vacuum Kids for PS. Why play NBA Shoot Out 97 when playing real hoops is "better?" Why play Tokimemo when real dating is "better?"
That's right. You play those games because you CAN'T do them in real life, which was my POINT. You can't play hoops professionally, or pilot an F-16, or annihilate legions of Orcs in real life, unless you're either especially lucky or significantly deluded.


Sega's Five Star Policy:
If at any point in development the game does not meet the Five Star Games Policy criteria by falling below a score of 90, the panel will direct designers to fix the problems, or drop the project all together. Let's hope that Sega doesn't shove their feet in their mouth and allow games like Cruisn' USA and Wargods to be released for their system, like this "other" system that claimed to have a Quality standard for their system.
This one worked well didn't it?

The Saturn has definately been snubbed by the gaming community in general, but SEGA will ALWAYS be involved in the gaming industry whether setting the pace, or lagging behind. Besides where would Namco get all their ideas for future games. :)

Darrius Joiner

I think that Sony should start gving a cut of their profits to Sega because SOA is selling so many PSXs for them. I mean without WD on the Saturn what's a gamer to do if he/she wants good quality rpgs? Buy an N64? Don't make me laugh. The PSX is looking better and better to me everyday. -Matt

>> Look Working Design should get there own booth because they been plubishing games for Sony before the E3 that happen and why should they use Sega Space Sega did the right thing "Get your ass out because your plubishing games for Sony so get your own booth"

Just one question, do you rebel against the use of periods?

Thomas Volpe

Scud Review:
At this rate I'm going to start buying Playstation games. At least then I know I'm going to get good graphics with my horrible gameplay (haha).

For Sale:N64 Dust Covers:
I know what most Nintendo 64 owners are thinking right now:

"Sure, I have a cool video game system, but now that I have completed Mario 64 and Turok in just a couple days each I don't have anything to spend my $60 to $100 on."

Well that's where you're wrong! Introducing the Nintendo 64 dust cover! Guaranteed to keep your Nintendo 64 dust free while you wait another 3 to 6 months for another decent game to come out (which will only keep you busy for 1 to 2 days) and then dust free after those few days all through the long months waiting for the next hot game!

Custom manufactured from polyvinyl chloride, your Nintendo 64 dust cover is guaranteed to prevent dust corruption for the lifetime of your Nintendo 64. And at a low introductory price of just $59.99 it's still one of the least expensive add-ons for your Nintendo 64 system.

Don't delay! Prevent dust today! With the only dust cover for your Nintendo 64...

- Jordan

E-Storm keeps raving about Crash being the best game ever made. Why? This game is so utterly boring it makes church seem like a roller coaster! I mean, I haven't seen any mag go on and on about this game. All the other mags even say it's a mediocre title and they gave it mediocre ratings (which it deserved), but you guys seemed to make it seem betterthen any other video game created. CRASH BANDICOOT IS A PILE OF DOG SHIT!

Paul Summerhill

However, on the Blockbuster side, the lower echelons seem recognize the title, and only a few knew the game in question. One unfortunate employee was hapless enough to ask, "Spiders Megamix?"


3DO's stock price is.....3DO (3 Dollars Only). Trip Hawkins is relegated to an Input-Only closet at 3DO where the employees can relieve themselves. Yes folks it's time face the music... (in the key of C, to the tune of "old McDonald had a farm"):

Ole Trip Hawkins bought the farm,
3D, 3D, Ooh.
On Trips farm he cooked his goose,
3D, 3D, Ooh.
Trip trip here and trip trip there,
Here a trip there a trip everywhere he trip trips,
Ol' Trip Hawkins bought the farm,
3D, 3D, Ooooooooooooh....

spam deflector

Blockbuster - Fighters Megamix......NOPE.
well, none of *MY* Blockbusters got FMM today, as SaturnWorld said they would. Incidentally, there are 14 shelves of PSX, 5 shelves of N64 (how? there are only 11 games!!!), and a whopping 2 shelves of Saturn stuff. i guess we know where BB stands on this issue, no? none of the managers i spoke with (3, in all) had any idea what i was talking about, none of the employees had any idea, there was nothing on the shelves, or windows
-- no promos, nothing. the best response i could get was : "well, we don't rent much Saturn stuff here..."
right. well, with that big selection (Astal, Myst, VF *1*, and of COURSE Die Hard Trilogy), it's no wonder. oh well. another day wasted dealing with people who try to tell me what i should like. no surprise there. thanks, Blockbuster. makes me glad i own that card.

Interview with Vic Ireland:
Zapf: "Are there any titles out in the US that you think deserve to have had a better translation?"

Victor Ireland: "Whew. Too many to list. Definitely Mystaria/Blazing Heroes. I think the crack was affecting the translator's job performance. All the FF's have fallen short, in my opinion. The text does not have the emotional impact to match the visuals."

Moderator: "Remember kids... He's not advocating the use of illegal narcotics."
Here, for the first time, SaturnWorld has world exclusive screenshots of Real Sound: Winds of Regret in action.

I opened the mailbox and couldn't believe my eyes!!!!!A Gamefan magazine. I didn't realize that they still sent magazines to their subscribers. I thought they just cashed you check, sent a few issues, then stopped mailing them. Now, anyone think they'll actually credit everyone that never got their April issue? Anyone from Gamefan care to comment?


(from SaturnWorld) We saw this note on USENET, and just had to reprint it here:
Perry went on to comment, "we recently put the Saturn version on HOLD whilst we talk to Sony about an exclusive deal. "This would be a business decision, [and] I still love the Saturn. So time will tell."

I love it(:P)! What is this? The mafia?

" I love you like a brother Johnny, but this is business." Bang, bang, bang, bang!

" Oh, God......Dave....(cough)...why....oh....why?"

" It was the money Johnny, it was the money" Bang, bang, bang!

With a couple more loyal supporters like Shiny, I think we can really clean up this year(heavy, heavy, heavy sarcasm intended).

Looks like somebody watched "The Last Don" this week.
That was me...and I was watching "The Last Don" that week. ;)

Suzuki, on the other hand, has been the definition of innovation and quality from Day One. His games have been the standard all others have reached for and failed (unless they copied. see: Namco).
Oh yeah, flamers, get a life. Get a Saturn.

Hare Razer

Besides, Tekken 3 should more appropriately be called Tekken 2.5. It's a shame the main reason this game was made off the System 12 board so it can be ported down to a PSX. The degree of difficulty in porting an arcade game to a home system should NOT be a factor in how a game is made. Unfortunately, this was the case w/ Namco and Tekken 3.

I Believe the Hype:
I believe Release dates are written in stone. I believe the Japanese version of a game MUST be better, because I can't understand it. I believe that Paulie Shore is funny. I believe that Sega, and Working Designs, do not want my money; they are in business just to personally piss me off. I believe the customer is always right, no matter how ignorant or wrong we actually are. I believe Programmers really spend all there time watching Star Trek reruns, making my games late. I believe that if it isn't in 3d, I cannot actually see it, therefore it is no good. I believe sales reps when they tell me that Sony loves me for who I am. I believe that people speak literally, even when the sarcasm is smacked into the back of my head with a 2 by 4. I believe Victor Ireland is Irish. I believe companies make games only because the love me; money has nothing to do with it. I believe the 16 year old sales rep at EB, who hasn't yet discovered Clearasil, understands the video game business better than anyone, never lies, and never makes stuff up because his girlfriend is on the other line. I believe my life will end if I can't play a game RIGHT NOW. I believe companies delay games because they really like to read the posts on Usenet, and enjoy full mailboxes of complaints; also I believe that the time spent reading said posts/e-mails will make the game come out faster - and bug free. I BELIEVE THE HYPE.


>> Concerning the Panzer Dragoon series, both soundtracks are masterpieces as far as video games go. It's kinda like making this comparison :
Panzer Dragoon Series = The Beatles
Panzer Dragoon 1 = Sgt. Pepper's Lonely Hearts Club Band
Panzer Dragoon 2 = Abbey Road
They are both kick ass CD's ! They both are considered classics.

Heh, heh.....I'm gonna start calling my dragon Ringo!


Timothy McVeigh:
I just think that they should take the jerk out back and shoot him, or rip him to shreads with a knife. I want him to die painfully!!! Think about the poor little babies without mothers. And a couple that's too old to have another child and they only had that one child.

He can't die yet. SOA hired him to do Sega Bomberman commercials.

Raymond W. Rowe
>> WD always claims that they listen to their customers (although I don't think so, it's more like "We'll hear you out, then we'll tell you why you're wrong.").

Thank god someone agrees with me on this! Yes, we'll listen to you, as long as you're prepared to kneel in our prescence or you'll be hounded off the newsgroup.

Simon Dominguez
Also stalking the booth was Midway's most digitizable actress Kerri Hoskins, best known for portraying Sonya Blade in the MK games. She looked as sexy as ever in her skin-tight garb, so we were especially surprised when she told us she's pregnant with twins. "I'm wearing a maternity-style assassin's outfit," Hoskins said, EGM suspects her twins will be identical palette swaps of each other.
And by the way, since I'm waiting for a, "I never said, If you recall I never stated, what do you know..." Marty, dude, are you EVER wrong?????
BTW, Saturn rocks! =D

Cooley 61
This is a flawless conversion of the Playstation version. Also this version is straight from Japan with all the oddles of blood and gore. There is even a violence warning sticker on the outside package. Saying that, if you can't handle the extra violence, I'd wait for the for sure censored Americam version.

>> BuyRite Rulz!:
>> Where did this place come from?

The ocean perhaps.

>> I have been buying my games from other online companies for years but I'm not going to any longer.

I really do feel sorry for you.

>> No I don't work for Buy-Rite

Yeah, I'm sure.

>> but I have tell you something, these guys are for real! I just got my first order and got 2 games for $25 and also got Tobal 2 (no where else had it) for a great price. You definetly got to check them out.

Yep, I made the mistake and did "check them out"

>> It took a lot of time getting through but it was worth it.

Probably because they're playing your games.

Check them out at :

Further Comments: Buy Rite makes their money back on shipping - so poor drones fall for the "GEE we got the lowest price trick".


Actually, there's one thing I wish WD would touch on: the fact that you can go in anybody's house and no one minds (well, they did in AO a bit "Mom! Pike's using our house as an expressway again). I'd love to see "So, you just walk into my house without knocking, invade my privacy when I could be doing God knows what, and you're looking for information...perhaps my friend Mr. Enchanted Battleaxe could give you some information, like whether or not your helmet can save you from your skull being split wide open...AAAYYYAAIII!! Heh heh..just kidding there son."

Jon Allegrezza

Paul R. Lange wrote:
>> Has anyone heard about easter eggs in Powerslave? I heard a rumor that a bonus game is hidden in it if you find all the secret stuff. Post a message if you've heard anything.

Well If you work for Lobotomy then surely you know that already;)
The Bonus game is Death Tank. A 3D multiplayer thing.
UK:resistance Saturn site

Subject: !!! PSX vs. Gay Anal Sex
Hands down...a dick up your butt is better than a PSX any day!


I agree, Suikoden was a quality rpg and I had a good time with it. However, I liked it for its traditional characteristics, not for its gimmicks. I didn't really knock myself out to get all 108 characters, considering 9 out of 10 of them would never see battle. And I mean a real party battle. The only kind of real battle in Suikoden.

The army vs army and one-on-ones? Yeah, I liked the engine for them..back when it was called rock-paper-scissors. Pretty spooky when you can compare an scene from the Simpson exactly with a game:

Simpsons: (Lisa)We'll have to decide it the old fashioned way, a game of rock-paper-sciscors.

Suikoden: We're going to battle!

Simp:(Lisa, thinking to herself)Poor predictable Bart, always choosing rock.

Sui: As always, they choose charge attack first.

Simp:(Bart, tth)Good ol' rock, nothing beats that!

Sui: Good ol' charge attack, nothing beats that!




Sui: Magic!

Simp: (bart)D'oh!

Sui: D'oh!

Jon Allegrezza

Sonic Busted!
Hedgehog arrested for possession
Early this morning, Sonic the Hedgehog was spotted illegally spin-dashing on the wrong side of the Virtua City Marina, street racing Super GT cars along Dolphin Tunnel. Virtua City Police engaged Sonic in a high-speed chase that swept through the city over the course of four hours, ending only in Sonic falling 30 feet off a platform in the Spring Hill Zone.

At the scene, arresting officer Janet Marshall found 3 grams of illegal blast processors, worth thousands on the black market. Blast processors were banned from non-16bit systems in the early 90's, as they had dangerously unstable effects, accelerating graphic effects in one characters, doing nothing for others. Sonic has been arrested before for BP possession, but had apparently been taken to full 32-bit operancy with the release of Sonic Jam.

Already, rumors are spreading among the game paparazzi that Sonic's recent breakup with longtime companion Sarah Bryant triggered his relapse. Sonic's career was flat during the mid-90's, with the mediocre Sonic 3D Blast his only Saturn title. However, the industry expects him to make a modest comback with his compilation title Sonic Jam, coming this August, and Sonic R, a charity race sponsored by Sonic Team Enterprises. Also rumored in the works is a totally remastered Sonic title in the works for the brand new Sega platform.
"If you Buy from Buy Rite, you're not buying Rite!" - Me
"If I ever hear about this shit happening again, I'll whip your ass raw and make you my bitch." -- Reader to Douglass Perry on Saturnworld
I predict that SEGA will keep the name Katana and shape the actual system to resemble the MK chick Katana's breasts. Squeeze to turn on and off? (Damn, I need to get out more.)
Women in video games:
Hsien-Ko from Darkstalkers
Ibuki from Street Fighter 2nd Impact
Chun-Li (not including Street Fighter Alpha)
The above three are female, but not wearing anything that screams "I'm a goddamn video game slut" Like Candy from Fighting Vipers. ;)


Obviously really effective advertising since I missed it. Sega need to use more TV ads and more cinema commercials. They are *reasonably* cheap and very useful as you can hit a wide target audience. Certainly in the run up to Xmas. What we need are lots of footage of Quake and DN3D and some message saying something along the lines of "Think your PSX can do this? Get fucked!" would work just fine :-)

Dave Chapman

Phosphor 99:
Thats right! While all you people have been arguing over whos got the biggest polygon TANDY has been working on the Phosphor 99! The system that will make other consoles obsolete! (including itself). I don't have all the specs yet but I do know it will be able to generate 1 billion frosted mini-polygons and run at 1 fps. Hah, pretty impressive huh? It will also be able to display 1 billion colors on the screen at one time(possibly causing irrepairable eye damage as well as busting your tv)!

It won't use cartridges or cd-rom! It will use the revolutionary paper and pencil medium to store all the games the software folks can write down! And it will have an additional storage medium that will use the high storage capability of vinyl disk called the 44 double-d!

But we all know its GAMES that make a good console great. And some of top software companies are working frantic on some of the best games out there! On the release date there should be one 50% finished game and several 8X10 glossys to play with. Some of the 3rd party companies already signed are:

Maws bait N tackle
Electronic Arts
and several other companies we can't name because we would be lying.

Some of the games being work on:
Pencil Break-fighting game with over 42 different color pencils.
Blank screen -puzzle game where you must find something to do.
Shake -3d shooter where you travel thru the microsoft building and shoot all the monsters (features bill gates as the end boss)
Duke Suk-em where.... Ooops gotta go my moms coming and I'm supposed to be in bed.... Um yes Phosphor 99! out in a flash, then up in smoke...

U R not red-E to fly plaything fly while playing it loud!!!

Daryn Brown

D2 on Saturn:
What was announced at the Creators' Conference, however, was something unexpected: instead of programming the game for Sega's next system, Warp will instead make the game for the Saturn. To make sure everybody heard correctly, Eno wrote "Sega Saturn" on a cocktail napkin and held it up for everone to see. When asked when he will announce the title publicly, he simply stated, "I already have."
I am new to this list and forgive me if I am in the wrong place. I bought a Sega Genesis System for my daughter and it came with VectorMan and "I" am hooked. The only problem is, is that it takes me two hours to get to the level that I am playing at. Does anyone know of any codes to get to Day 10. My husband will kill me if I even try to play the game again.
>> Rogue rules !!! Her "learning" attack which kisses her opponent and then learned his/her special attack is awesome!! I think she is the best when she gains Dhalsims flame. Instantmulti-hit combo finisher.

As great of a combo as that makes, I feel bad making her kiss Dhalsim.....
That was me, and I still feel bad making her kiss Dhalsim. :)

>> Once in awhile if we get hot information, I'll post something on the newsgroups. This was the case with the price drop. If you have a problem with the way it was posted, deal with it.

I dealt with it by slamming your sorry ass. Welcome to USENET, chump.

Torrence Davis

>> Sony's not gay! I'm Gay!
>> BTW, Are their any good games for a cock sucker like me? (Or should I buy a N64?)

You might try import games. They tend to have more gay characters in their games than US games (Like Groove on Fight)

>>I hope no "major" PSX title comes out this week, as Grandia may not sell any copies at all :(

Well, it would be interesting since Grandia would probably beat out any but the biggest PS titles (Parappa 2 (the next version is supposed to be based on a Broadway Music theme; you tap the controller to make your gay cartoon dog prance and mince around the stage lisping showtunes) perhaps).


I can just see it now...Bernie's in his Superman costume, pretending to fly, when his secretary comes into his office...

Secretary: Sir, a representative from Sega of Japan is here to see you...

Bernie: Whooosh! Zooom! Ah, what an unexpected surprise...give him a Batman cape and let him in!

SOJ Rep: Hello, Mr. Stolar.

B: Put on your cape, man! Your cape!

SOJ: Uh, all right...

B: Now, then, old friend. What did you want to talk to me about? Is there a menace in Gotham City?

SOJ: Uh, no, er...'Superman.'

B: It's not like you to pay social visits, Batman.

SOJ: Well, 'Superman', I'm here on behalf of Sega Enterprises, I've been assigned to relieve you of your position.

B: What?

SOJ: Yes, that's right, take Krypto and get the hell out of here.

B: Why, you cad! You must be under the control of some criminal mastermind!

SOJ takes off cap.

SOJ: Bernie, get the hell out of here...

B: You mean, you're SERIOUS!?!?!? But, I was having so much fun running Sega!

SOJ: That's nice, Bernie. But I think it's time we took you back to the retirement home and gave you your medication.

B: But I don't like that place! The people there are mean and they don't let me watch TV!

SOJ: Well, we'll give you your own TV, how's that?

B: Really? That's great! Okay, let's go!


>> Eh, make that an annoying pager-like vibration. Maybe the next generation of controllers will have real force feedback.

Maybe we should come up with a new word for the pseudo-force feedback, maybe buzzback or don't-let-your-girlfriend-near-this-when-she's-feelin'- a-little-lonely-back ;)

Road Avenger Theme:
I know I'm gonna revive
When I am...on the road.
I've got nowhere to hide
When I am...on the road.
And there's no use in wondering why
It made you feel like running from me then, girl
How many more tears must I shed
So as to melt the freezing wall of time?
So I'm gonna break it
Have no fear...on the road.
You know I'm sure to make it
No matter what's...on the road.
And don't you know it's very hard
She keeps barking to the silver moon
But I don't care how long it takes
As long as she lights up my way in the gloom
Until the very moment...when I see you again
I keep steering along the road to the sun
The burning sun
Hear the roars of my car, I'm nearly round the bend
Searching for a love that we did share
There's no one who can stop me now
Stirring, no? This is from memory, so there might be a word or two wrong, but it should be very nearly exact (after all, who could forget that theme?). :)
"It's hard for third parties to put out software when the first party isn't supporting the platform," says one Capcom representative.

To the citizens of the Sega Nation:

Well, what a year we've had, a year that all of us here at Sega of America are very proud of. We began by jumping into a Crazy Taxi and ended by changing the face of gaming (once again) with the incredible experience that is Shenmue. In between we've converted a further two million non-believers to the glory of Dreamcast, launched the world's first console gaming network, had numerous animated conversations with Seaman, lost our hearts to Ulala, outrun The Man in Jet Grind Radio, and showed EA what sports games should play like in NFL 2K1 and NBA2K1. But we couldn't have done any of this without the incredible support of all the Sega fans out there who have stuck with us during the tough times and now are reaping the joys that only incredibly fun and innovative games can bring... and there's only one company that can consistently create such ass-kicking, Sony-stomping games....SEGA!!!!!!

Happy Holidays to you all,

Peter Moore
Comment: I could live in that dream forever... :)

>> a playstation 2 is a lot like a lump of coal.

they're black,
they're ugly,
they're no fun,
a lot of kids who deserved one this xmas didnt get one,
and the best use you can make of one is to burn it.

I thought it was like a woman.

It can be used upright or on it's bottom.
It's very expensive.
There's no satisfaction.
No one understands the Emotion Engine.
It gets taken out less and less the longer you have it.
And finally, it prefers seeing movies over playing videogames.

Charles Doane

I've been away for a while so I don't know if this has been discussed yet but, does anyone else feel uncomfortable when Ryo asks everyone if they know where "sailors" hang out?

"Can you tell me where I can find some sailors?"

"Excuse me, are those sailors over there?"
- Chad Faber

Pic by UKResistance.com
Supreme Court order a recount for PS2 sold in US


>> there are only few kind of posts in this NG or anyother game NG.

those are

Sega/Sony/Nintendo/MS is better than Sega/sony/Nintendo/MS posts

FS/FT posts that one ends up getting screwed by AOLer.

Help with I am stuck in so and so game posts that no one will help.

Review Posts that no one cares.

and finally posts of stop rant other system posts.

I resent the fact that you didn't include my own posts as a separate catagory altogether!
/removes minmay from next years Christmas Card List


Screw that, PS2 is most like NEC's PC-FX!! Check this out:

Developed by a major home electronics company (SONY)
Developed by a major home electronics company (NEC)

Supposed to have the best 2-D graphics qualities but the 2-D on a SEGA system (Saturn) was better
Supposed to have the best 3-D graphics qualities but the 3-D on a SEGA system (DC) was better

Made to stand up vertically, in contrast to horizontally standing systems
If you spend $30 for a stand, you can stand up your PS2 vertically.

All people want to spend their money on are hentai games with a lot of FMV and barely any gameplay
All people want to spend their money on are Squaresoft games with a lot of FMV and barely any gameplay

One mediocre launch title (Team Innocent), the rest sucked
One mediocre launch title (Tekken Tag), the rest sucked

I bet you don't know anybody who owns this system, since so few were manufactured.
I bet you don't know anybody who owns this system, since so few were manufactured.

Hehehe ;)

Lukas B Drelick

Mario is the most incompetent dolt to ever grace a videogame.

First of all, he's a womanizer. That wasn't Princess Peach he was saving in Donkey Kong, that was a girl named Pauline! Mario dumped her after one game, and Princess Peach isn't his first Princess either.

Secondly, plumber-boy has yet to ever be seen actually fixing a pipe. The man has no visible means of support, and several expensive hobbies like Tennis, Golf, and Kart Racing.

Thirdly, he never finished off an enemy. Donkey Kong is still around, no worse the wear for the "capture" by the mustachioed maniac. Bowzer has been spotted on the same race course as Mario and his kidnap victim Princess Peach. Apparently Mario couldn't even serve an order of protection on a turtle.

Mario is a villain. He rides endangered animals. He breaks into castles and helps himself to any coins he finds. He smashes bricks and damages private property.

Sonic, on the other hand, doesn't need a job. Most hedgehogs live by the rules of nature, and Sonic's only unnatural item is the shoes. That, and he's blue. And kinda fast.

Sonic doesn't play up to any Princess to get her daddy's money, either.

Sonic does have an unhealthy affinity for gold rings, but it's not his fault that some nutcake leaves the things all over the place. At least he doesn't go breaking into castles to get them.

Sonic's a much better guy than Mario. I'm of the opinion that if Mario saw a Flicky, he'd fireball the poor thing.


Fight the Power!
Tired of Sony's strongarm tactics? Want to stick it back in their faces? Put this up on your page. Sony buys Final Fantasy VII, Dragon Quest VII, puts Electronic Arts in their back pocket, blah, blah, blah. Are you sick of those snobby PSX owners lording their "superior system" and "cool commercials?" If the answer's "Yes!", then get the official SaturnWorld protest button today! Yes, for only one day, SaturnWorld is letting users download this lovely, exclusive animated GIF, which flashes the message "Enough, already!" And it’s yours absolutely free, free, free! Undermine a multi-million dollar ad campaign with just five seconds of download time. Get it now!

It got to the point that I stopped using my PSx for about three weeks because I knew Wild Arms was in the system.

Joe Ottoson
>> [Shenmue] How long does it take a cut to heal?]

It was put on when he was unconcious and there are no mirrors in the game, he doesn't even know it's there! SHHHH! Wait and see how long it takes him to notice... LOL

- Jordan

(On the final DC and its special prize in the box)
Let's see what that special thing is - a note that reads -

Dear Sucka,

You got the last Dreamcast.

As you noticed, all the good games have been bought by Thanksgiving and not being reproduced anymore and the other games are in the crappy budget bin.

If you had got this for X-mas or a birthday - well . . . obviously, the person who bought it for you did not think much about you.

Hope you enjoy this,

Sega of America


That actually seems sort of silly as an outcome. NBA2K2 ads are probably already done running, as the game is now months old, and the cost to even run the spot probably far exceeded the pittance of $50,000. Nike gets nothing, Sega gets a tax break on a donation they'd probably budgeted to run the spots with anyway, and no wrongdoing is admitted. Sega's coming out way ahead on this deal, and Nike's getting zilch. Nike ain't exactly the masters of bargaining here, at least not as I see it.

NIKE: HEY SEGA! Stop that Ad run you've been making for three months!
SEGA: Stop our three-month ad run after three months? Erm, Okay.
NIKE: And DONATE money to our favorite children's charity too!
SEGA: Put our name in front of kids and get a tax deduction? Good idea.
NIKE: Don't MAKE us come after your ass this hard again!


Come with me on a journey into the mind's eye... <English> This is a big joke and shouldn't be taken seriously! </English>

Phantasy Star Online: The Trading Card Game!
by Fat and Rich Wizards of the Coast (who else?)
* THRILL to the excitement of playing your favorite video game in trading card format! And then come play Phantasy Star when you're done with Pokemon...
* MARVEL at your inability to find rare cards (like the Nei's Claw or the Ranger Wall) forcing you to spend more money on booster packs and overpriced, opened cards...
* BEHOLD the gamers who take second and third jobs at Piggly Wiggly and Jiffy Lube so they can support their trading card game habit...
* WONDER at the fact that for something that calls itself a trading card game, everybody just goes out and buys new cards and nobody seems to trade with each other...
...and if you enjoyed the trading card game, you'll love...
Phantasy Star Online: The Live Action Role Playing Game
Tired of sword and sorcery? Vampirism lost its appeal? Don't like detective stories? Then come and experience the PSO-LARP, which guarantees that you'll have just as much fun as if you were playing PSO at home!
* Special rules allow hacking and item duplication, allowing diva players to dominate the floor and make the game less fun for others!
* Inconsistent rule enforcement means that quiet, introverted players can get away with unlimited technique usage and discount equipment purchases!
* Poor translation of terms and jargon means hours of argument over interpretation of combat and encounter scenarios!
...and if you thought that was even remotely funny, I present to you...Phantasy Star Online: Murphy's Rules! (which could be by Steve Jackson Games)
Socialized Medicine -- (picture: a Ranger with a band-aid on his face holds a sheet of paper, comparing his with one held by a Force with both legs in casts and one arm in a sling)
* In Phantasy Star Online, it always costs ten units of currency to restore all health in the medical center, regardless of whether you're down by two hit points or two-thousand hit points.
Credit where credit is due -- (picture: a scrawny android kneels proudly beside a dead Hildebear. Next to the android is a brawny Hunter, leaning on his sword, panting and dripping with sweat.)
* In Phantasy Star Online, experience points are divided evenly between any number players who register at least one hit on the same monster, no matter who did more work to defeat it.
I just work here -- (picture: the clerk at the Check Room is shrugging at an annoyed Force. Two lockers of the same size are shown behind them; one is bulging to contain a very long photon sword, the other is bare except for a single Scape Doll.)
* In Phantasy Star Online, a tiny computer chip used to enhance armor takes up the same amount of space as a seven-foot long bladed weapon when stored for future use.

-KKC, who used to enjoy paper RPGs and wonders what happened to the golden age of fantasy and wargaming. Is it just me, or did there not used to be a stigma long ago?

"Needless to say...while Ethan and Flash were admiring their own booties with the close ups, I died horribly many many times!"
Evil Elly - alt.games.phantasy-star(Flash3, Author)
YES! I am not alone. .. Dig this.
Here are some stupid questions we get where I work.

1. "Do you have the back-piece?" (Back-piece: see also RF COnvertor)
The cromag customers can't grasp the idea of the term RF Convertor/Switch. PAthetic.

2. "Why's War Gods box so big?" (In reference to War Gods N64 display box)
All I have to say is. . . Well; it worked.

3. This conversation:"What's a good game?" says the cattle.
"Well, what type of game are you looking for? Fighting, Sports, Action?" I reply, grasping for something that obviously I will never get from this customer, a clue.
"Uhhh. .. . I dunno. What's good?"
"Well there's Tomb Raider."
"Is that like Tekken*?"
"no. . . . " I walk away.
(*) Why is it Tekken players cannot for the life of them pronounce Tekken? They commonly refer to it as Tekken with a long "E". Resulting in this ear piercing catastrophe. Teeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeekken.

4. "Is it tight?" (In reference to a game I reccomend)
I wouldn't know, I've never shafted a CD/Cart before. I'd imagine it could be quite painful and embarrassing at the emergency room.

5. "Can I use play these games on the PLaystation?" (As they peruse the PC game section) "Why not" (After I answer)
I dunno ask the pope tough guy.

And another thing I hate is the liberal BULLSHIT RETURN POLICY!!! Customers who cannot read Game Fan or EGM for a synopsis or review of a game deserve to get stuck with whatever they purchase. Quite frankly I'm tired of the bullshit excuse of "Did not like" being filled out on game returns that aren't defective/damaged/or otherwise unplayable. Not liking a game is not our fault. Especially considering I told them repeatedly that "The Crow: City of Angels" is a terrible game! Or buying a copy of Die Hard Arcade which you returned the previous day because it was too easy, then returning it again after your dirty cunt friends got their chance to play it also! To hell with return policies. It's your own fault for not being informed! Take two minutes to read the blurb on the back of the games box. Damn. This just pisses me off to no end. Returns should only be made on defective products for the same title. No money back, you fucking bought Criticom after I told you openly that it was a bad game so you should burn in Hell with it!!! Ack. . . I'm having a terrible day. That was rather theraputic. *phew*

Mountain Dew Geist
For those that don't know, Sega is making a bunch of game for Sprint PCS vision-enhanced phones, including versions of Monkey Ball and Puyo Puyo. Anyway, if you go to buy on the website, this little message thanks you:

Thank you for your interest in Sega Mobile games! Purchasing one of our games will dramatically improve the quality of your life, and give you the confidence that comes from owning the latest in cell phone gaming.

Well I'm definitely sold now! :-)

Adam Blaiss
>> Look at this quote from Castlevania Dungeon about the development of Castlevania Ressurection for Dreamcast (http://www.classicgaming.com/castlevania/column17.htm).
"...Although what I was told was all off the record, I had a very reliable friend who worked on the project for a short time who claimed that a big reason the game was scrapped was because of egos stemming from Japan. When Resurrection project was given to an American team, feelings were "hurt" overseas. Essentially the Japs didn't think Konami Of America could pull off a 'Vania game. Later, when things started looking good graphically and what-not, certain members of the N64 team and other KOJ people felt threatened at the rate of success the American team was showing. Apparently when the project was well under way there was a lot of micro-management from Japan when initially there was none, and things started getting really bad when there was a move to transfer Resurrection from the U.S. to Japan for revamping and editing. (In the words of my friend "So the Japs could claim it as their own.") I'm sure this isn't the only factor, but apparently it was one of the bigger ones...

I can't believe he said 'Japs'! Jesus christ.

>> Agreed. We can also choose not to shop there, if we choose.

>>> That's it! I'm reporting your ass to the Department of Redundancy Department!

You're reporting my ass to the Department of Redundancy Department? MY ass? To the Department of Redundancy Department?
>> SEGA to buy Infogrames: unconfirmed but possibily true.

>> other mergers of large Japanese videogame companies coming....

This post brought to you by the writer of the post, "PS3 to be jagga-riffic?"
I'm so bored I'm drinking bleach.
>> The burglar used a Playstation as a weapon:
A 69-year-old woman was hit on the head with a computer game console as she tried to stop her son being attacked by a burglar. Maureen Palmer, 69, found her 41-year-old son wrestling with the intruder at the family home in Greystoke Road, Slough, Berkshire. Mrs Palmer cried out "nobody hurts my son", but the man hit her over the head with the PlayStation that he had just stolen from the living room.

Luckily he didn't use an xbox it would have killed her...the xbox weighs a ton

>> I like it when in Gauntlet you go through a room full of ghosts and the Dungeon Master sarcastically exclaims "that was a heroic effort!" LOL

...but in Gauntlet Legends he sounds more proud than sarcastic. :-(



"Would you pay $8.95 per month on top of the regular Xbox Live fees to play Phantasy Star Online Episode I & II on the Xbox?"

Current results:

Yes 2296 (9%)
No 24292 (91%)

Lookin' good Sega, lookin' good!

Kevin Sullivan

(in continuation of that thread)

I wish they had done a wider base poll:

"How do you feel about PSO on the Xbox?"

1) I don't care, I love it and I'm buying it!

2) I'd like to get it but I don't have broadband or Live so I can't play it.

3) I already have Live and I'm not paying extra fees above that!

4) $9 a month? That would cut into my crack money...

5) Not an Xbox owner/Don't care.

- Jordan

>> Like how you have to buy a $30 remote control to play DVDs on the X-Box, when the competing consoles (and computers) can let you do the same from the system itself?

Is that sort of like having to buy a $30 memory card on a competing console just to save games, where the Xbox can let you do the same from the system itself?

Robert P Holley

My first, and only experience with Buyrite was as follows.

I sent a question about the availability of an import Saturn game. I got an email back from them about it... with a virus attached (I caught it with Norton). I emailed them back, letting them know they were sending ALL their customers viruses, and I got an email back from them claiming there was no viruses being mailed... there was a virus attached.

I got the game from NCS.

Phillip Roncoroni

>> "A Complete N64 System, with the Expansion Pack! 5 Controllers, power pack, and AV cord included. Along with 14 GREAT GAMES, listed at the bottom of page."

Okay, you _know_ the seller is supcisious when he thinks there are 14 great games on the N64. :p I think the N64 market is nonexistant. I've given away a couple of systems and games to people just because I don't see any reason to hold on to them and they have no worthwhile selling or trading value.

>> " There will also be a bonus Gameboy Game, Tetris!"

(looking for a Buy Now option)

(on Alien Soldier and its title screen oddness)
The Japanese version has one of my favorite pseudo-English phrases ever. At the top of the title screen it says: "VISUALSHOCK! SPEEDSHOCK! SOUNDSHOCK! NOW IS TIME TO THE 68000 HEART ON FIRE!" (referring to the MDs MC68000 CPU, I assume). Below, it says "FOR MEGADRIVERS CUSTOM".

J Bagley
>> Sonic is coming back in full force. A new ANIME in Japan called Sonic X, and new games that will supposedly take the world by storm like Poke'mon did.

>>> I thought Sega learned its lessons to not underestimate its competitors.

Nope, that was Nintendo's lesson in 1992. XD

Chakan - Likes Sega Stuff! Send lists!!

(on the Genesis Barbie games)
>> Barbie games: Are they as bad as they look?

I've never played them but, yes. :-)

"To insanity and beyond..."

>> Earnest Evans: Have it on Genesis, has anyone played it on Sega CD? It’s the same thing, just with redbook audio?

Hated the game so much I don't even remember the music =0

Die Earnest!

> I didn't care for it, but then I also don't think much of El Viento
> (blasphemy, I know).

Die Benjamin!

Will Shaffer
<< The day me and a friend saw the newly released Duke Nuke'm at Target for $20, deciding if we should buy it, then hearing a kid ask his dad to buy one of the 2 copies. "Let's pick out [someone's] gift first and we'll be back" he told his son.

<< There were no copies when they returned. Had some great times with that game too =0

SOOO... IT WAS YOU! YOU %@#^%#@*^%^$%$! ;-)


>> My purchases for Spring Break
Well, I'm back in Winnipeg for the break, and after learning that my truck's tranny WASN'T stripped by the idiot tow truck operator who brought it in (LOOOOONG story 8), decided to go crazy and do some shopping today. I hit two Microplays, a new EB, and a CD store that had some used titles. Passed on going to a second EB store, because I had already rung up too much money. 8)
- X-O Man Of War and Iron Man in Heavy Metal,

You poor bastard.

Joe Ottoson
> say the DC was getting moist

lol! i know, i'm so childish. i'm gonna go make my Dreamcast moist now.

abe m.
>Not to spoil anything (or make anyone think I have inside information, because I don't) but somehow I don't see Shenmue having a happy ending. Either Ryo will not get all of the satisfaction he's been after,

WHAT? You mean he never will find those sailors! (Sorry, I couldn't resist)


"XGameCollectorX" wrote:
> I will do it for free if you supply your own media. Then I can make a backup for myself as well as the one for you!

I can see the sheer proudness when you show your console collection to your friends.

" Aaaah... and this is my collection!"

" ... Uhh.. These are all cd-rs"

" That's right! I'm a cheap bastard!"

Comment: Though not found in RGVS, rather ASG(Alt.Sega.Genesis), this one was just too amusing to pass up.
> So people won't think im a hypocrite, I posted this after seeing his response and will be my final post on this topic, maybe even my final post ever.

There are few times I read a post and feel such a great and massive wave of apathy shoot through each and every cell of my body. If you're leaving usenet. Good. The entire world's better off if you communicate less. Not because you're saying anything shocking, or generating disruptive thoughts, but because you're insufferably BORING.

May you be skullfucked by skinheads while your loved ones wager over how long it'll take your corpse to bloat.

Joe Ottoson

>Doesn't look very mint to me... but then I never use ebay, what does " mint" mean nowadays anyways?

MINT = Maybe Its Not Torn

Hank Hinklesnort

Comment: Another good one from ASG...talking about another questionable ebay auction...

"Max Lords" wrote in message:
> Would you swap my sealed Shadowrun for Genesis for your sealed Gunstar Heroes? I've been wanting a sealed Gunstar for a looooooong time

Infidel! You just want it for the fruit rollup. So you can savor it's late 90's goodness.


> > Am I the only one in here that didnt like the DC......... sure there were a couple decent games, but overall...... yeesh, I was actually surprised it lasted as long as it did

> > *puts on flame retardant suit*

> Well, you're a good guy and alll...so we know you're not trolling or anything....;)

Was a good guy. The key word being "was".

*pulls outs flame thrower* ;-)

Robert P Holley

> Yeah I'm soooo angry about how much (insert pathetic ebay item here) costs to be shipped, because I truly know what it REALLY costs to send. Furthermore I am smarter than the seller and I want to inform the authorities at ebay that (insert gay ebay ID here) is violating the precious user agreement and infact insulting ME the prospective buyer/ebay hero! If it actually sells it'll go no more than 5.00, and if THATS too much fer ya maybe you can blow someone for it.

Wow. It's cool how you proved that the guy wasn't an asshole by basis of comparison.

Joe Ottoson

{on Mobile Light Force and the whole renaming fiasco}
I was SO pissed when I bought these games, the cover art tricked me into thinking I was buying a Charlie's Angels action game and I got overhead shooters. False advertising. :P

{on ManciGames magazine}
>> It's coming along... :)
>> Bel
>Yes, but it's just stupid to roll out a product when the product doesn't even exist. What's with that name anyway? Sounds like something targeted to metrosexuals.

Retrosexuals? =P


> Most people don't blame Sony for the death of the Dreamcast; people blame Sony fanboyism for keeping more people from embracing the Dreamcast with its superior games (at PS2 launch and for a long time afterwards) and much lower price, and therefore contributing to its death along with the filthy pirates.

Bingo. Ignorant teenagers who bought in to Sony's hype killed the Dreamcast, not the PS2 itself. "d00d... Dreamcast duzn't got Metal Ger SOl1d sos its gotsa suck!" Then... 2 years later... "d00d you duzn't play as Snake? d00d that like totally sux r00xers!"

- Jordan
> 2) Why are you attacking Bel in this thread? It only serves to alienate Mac fans and Bel fans.

Neither exist. Hah. I told you Bel.

Joe Ottoson
I always thought it was ironic that Sega's adverts for Shenmue 2 on DC in the USA stated, "This time, it's personal." -- right before they cancelled it for business reasons.

> The whole GC "online plan" just makes me kind of sick to my stomach. I mean, they put out this modem for Sonic Team...and that's it. I mean, the only other game that can use it is Mario Kart, right...and that's just for LAN play, unless you use one of the third party tunneling software. Just kind of sad... :(

Isn't it pitiful, you say? But its not so bad, Nintendo says, we give you *connectivity* so you have to get GBA's, link cables, e-readers and most wonderful off all e-reader cards! Have fun buying 50 packs of cards to get the one you need to open that exclusive level of SMW4, wowee, sure is much cooler than online multiplayer, Nintendo your the bestest. ;)


Re: mind blowing 100K ebay Japanese system collection

Never send $100k to someone who spells Sega's last system "DERMCAST" over and over again...

> Damn...too bad the auction ended :(
> $100 for a Genesis with no games.....what a deal!

I like the line: "basicly as soon as you get it you can start playing.
Sorry... no games included." :^)


Re: GamCom.Com - Game Console Accessories at Wholesaler Price

Lookng for misplld subj line? Loking 4 rndom abbrviations? Loookng for a company tht wil mispl "member"? Look no frher than GameConArtist.con1

Re: what's the significance of the numbers on the tail of the F-16 in Guile's stage?

> for instance, the arcade SF2, SF2ce, SF2T, SSF2, SSF2T all have a 512 on the F-16. the SNES versions of SF2 and SF2T have a 64 on the F-16. but the SNES SSF2 has a 512 on the F-16, why is this?

Maybe they took a guess at how many incarnations of SF2 would be put out :-p



Capcom guessed a bit low, didn't they?



>Now we can be bored online too!

That's what Omar's posts are for.


I've never quite understood why this game was so popular. Even my children thought it was silly--after watching me play it, they started running around the house asking the furniture questions like "Have you seen a black car?"


> Sega announces Shenmue Online

Is this one of those Talk'em'Ups ?

> Baraka, my girlfriend's cat, just ate a lizard....*whole*....while it was alive. Being the kind of guy who will scoop up crickets, spiders and other small insects that may make their way into the house, and gently put them back outside...this was just a bit upsetting. I even grabbed him and shook him, telling him to spit it out. No luck, kitty ate it all. *Then*, he finds the tail still flopping around on the floor...and eats it too! Gross!

> Bel

Baraka vs. Reptile...







> >> After playing the Sonic Adventure games, I'd say that sonic team died a
> >> long time before the dreamcast.
> >
> > They did alright by Puyo Puyo Fever...
> Can you really go wrong with a Puyo Puyo-style game?

Sure; you could make it 3D, add a cat that likes to move slowly and fish, have a 4 player online version that costs $10 a month to playbecause it's "massively multiplayer", etc.


Re: whoa! Nintendo using IBM once again ?
> Sprite, buddy....you're a good guy and all....but is there *anyway* you can see your way to, maybe, letting RGVS slide with this crossposting stuff? I mean, now granted....what's going on with the other consoles is all very interesting and stuff...but those who want to know about it already subscribe to those specific newsgroups....no real reason they should come here to get it...and all it does is open up a 200 post thread about something that's just *completely* unrelated to Sega...


Bel for president! ;-)


c819393 wrote:

It's not a dancing game, but you might like MICROSOFT IDIOT SHOUTING SIMULATOR. It was ported over using the Windows CE environment.


Re: WH3R3 C4N 1 D0WNL04D PR0P3LL0R 4R3N4 ????!??!?!

>>"D.J.Gilmour®" wrote:
>>TH4NX 4 SH4R1NG T3H W4R3Z , I 4M T3H 1337 !!!!!!!
> You're an idiot...(and yes, I just enjoy saying it)
> Bel

I was going to say "up your ass and around the corner" but that works too.

>I desperately need a copy of this game is anyone willing to seel me one????

You misspelled "seal", and this is the 21st century. They no longer use seals as a mode of transportation in the delivery of goods.

Jojo Jonesy
funarcade@gmail.com wrote:
> Hey Ted ... no reason to be nasty. Feel free to give Peter Moore a call and ask him whom I am.

" Hey Peter Moore, who is funarcade@gmail.com?"
" Some dipshit?"
" He says he "was in charge of the launch" of the Dreamcast."
" What, someone from Access PR?"
" No, they were aware of the Japanese launch, and the Hollywood video program, and wouldn't insist on a firm date of 9/9/99 for the launch."
" Well, maybe it's me. I was the person in charge of the US launch, and have always had my head so far up my ass I've never taken notice of anything outside of it. Or Charles Bellfield or John Golden; they were director of marketing communications and product marketing, respectively. I mean, it would be incredibly overreaching for either of them to claim to have been in charge of the launch, but it could be; even then I'd think they'd have rememebered the Hollywood video program. Maybe it was the mailroom guy."
" I see. Those executives would each certainly have a lot to answer for. Oh, and Peter? Fuck you for driving the DC into the ground so you could take off for the Xbox."


RE: List of games compatible with microphone?

>>Yes, it works with Mr. Driller. Try it - you'll probably start by just shouting drill over and over, but you'll end up shouting obscenities at Susumu in no time.

>>If any game can teach you to curse like a sailor, it's Mr. Driller w/Microphone!

>Well, there is "SWAT" on XBox, with the headset. I yell at my teammates all day long in that one...;)

Well, I don't konw about SWAT, but I know that my brother was over here playing rainbow six 3 with a headset, and he kept saying how "gay" his guys were because they weren't doing what he told them to.

So I decided to test his theory... I leaned over and shouted an order into his headset. I said, "Engage in homosexual activity."

His squad's response? "Roger, holding."


> If you use canned air, be careful as the air coming out is extremely cold - and if you hold the can upside down, the liquid coming out is about -50 deg F - it can freeze your skin.

Yeah, but it's great for pranks! ;)

Scott H

> - KKC, who wanted to post first so he could use the word 'hip' before Bel had a chance to. :)

Bel must be rubbing off you you Kendrick! ;)


> Speaking of Xbox 360, this is the first time a next generation console is making a launch game offering that don't look very different from the current consoles.

If you mean preexisting franchises: there's the PS2 launch.
If you mean not especially advanced looking graphics: there's the PS2 launch.


{thedcd.com April's Fools joke}
While Tsurumi didn't cite any particular article that caused Sega to make war with April 1st pranksters, he did mention this: "Sega is NOT merging with Capcom, there is NO such thing as Segacom, and we ARE NOT making anymore consoles. Ever. EVER. No new NiGHTs, no new Panzer Dragoon, no Shenmue 3, and no good Sonic games. NONE. If anyone ever tells you otherwise, send their address to our attorneys, and we'll be sure to sue them until they can't afford pants. That's right, not even PANTS."

{on Pop'n Music 2}
>>>Ted wrote:
>>benstylus wrote:

>>>And, you didn't mention the Pop N Controller...What's with that?

>>It wasn't necessary to mention it.

>>>I don't buy it... You've been hurt by a Pop N Controller, haven't you...

>>My mother was killed by a drunk Pop'n Music Controller driver...

Ted, Benstylus

{on the top selling games of 2004 and 2005}
Katamari Damacy was released in 2004, so let's look at the top selling games of 04:
1. Grand Theft Auto: San Andreas (PS2)
2. Halo 2 (Xbox)
3. Madden NFL 2005 (PS2)
4. ESPN NFL 2K5 (PS2)
5. Need For Speed: Underground 2 (PS2)
6. Pokemon Fire Red /w Adapter (GBA)
7. NBA Live 2005 (PS2)
8. Spider-Man: The Movie 2 (PS2)
9. Halo (Xbox)
10. ESPN NFL 2K5 (Xbox)

Looking at these lists, I'd say OutRun doesn't necessarily need to be dumbed down for the PS2 audience, it just needs more angry black folks in it. Either that or a Star Wars license.


>BelPowerslave wrote
>>rob.ocelot wrote:
>> Almost all of those early EA Genesis games were either Mac or Amiga ports. If you think Dark Castle is bad, you should try Sword of Sodan on for size.

>Oh man, I can't believe you even mentioned that game...;) Fuck me it's bad...like, real, real bad!

I laughed for about ten minutes at that line!. We should ammend the Genesis Game Guide entry for Sword of Sodan to include your comment :-)


>Kendrick Kerwin Chua wrote:
> Seriously, you can't imagine that the game was named carelessly. There's nothing objectionable in the game (apart from the main character being acerbic and annoying) and none of the dialogue or art is suggestive in any way. And even gamers who haven't played it know the game. It's a rare example of brilliant, self-perpetuating marketing from Sega.

True, one of the few to use the microphone (and I would think the first) for the Dreamcast. But just think of having a conversation with a phrase that started with "Hey, have you tried Seaman? Wow, its really great, Seaman I mean, is really good, very unusual. You can borrow my Seaman if you want to try it." Very wrong in so many ways

KKC, bluecrab5

>Scott H wrote:
> Well, when a Genesis can be had for $15 and SFII SCE can be purchased for $3 complete, I don't know what's holding you back! An NES I understand, man, paying $50 for that thing, and getting incomplete games for $5 and up, just really doesn't appeal to me as much as practically everyone else.
Scott - Admiring the irony in public perception, Genesis doesn't have enough colors to be "good", but oh man that NES is gamer heaven. ;)

I'd consider buying an NES if I could be sure I wouldn't have to blow in the carts or tap them a dozen times to get them to play. I think a lot of people do look at most of those 8-bit games through rose colored glasses though. A lot of what we consider "classic" games, haven't stood the test of time very well to me. Ninja Gaiden is probably the worst example of this. Back in the day, I thought TMNT2: The Arcade Game was a technological marvel for the NES, now I can't tolerate it. If I got another NES, my first picks would be Jackal, Contra, Super Contra, and Galaga. I'd also buy Milan's Secret Castle, but only so I could break it with a sledge hammer.

Scott H, Grestang

> What web site can go to to get the roms for shining force

You're using Gmail; you're posting through Google Groups; have you ever considered actually using Google's search engine? Typing three of the words in your post and two sets of quote marks, I came up with something like 70,000 hits, and all the visible ones seem to be relevant.

Learn to fish, you (choose one: lazy/ignorant) bastard.


RE: Top 5 Genesis games you would like to be redone on current consoles

I would like to see XBLA re-releases akin to R-Type XBLA for any of these. I would especially love Shinobi III done this way, but I'd also take Strider, Revenge of Shinobi, Shadow Dancer, Golden Axe, Golden Axe II, Mystic Defender, Sword of Vermillion, and well, the whole Genesis library that anybody remembers liking really.

This new 2.5D remix approach ensures a degree of quality control that Sega's XBLA and compilations do not have. I get a little bit more than if I just went on e-bay and bought the original. Stupid people who think everything ought to be 3D get tricked into playing great games. Everybody wins.

Scott H
RGVS All Stars: Hardcore Members

RGVSega - Created in 1993

First Postings as per the Google Groups archive:
Azum - 1994
Eugene Moon - 1994
Greg Wittel - 1995
Terrence Briggs - 1995
Greg Gillis - 1996
BelPowerslave - 1997
Benstylus - 1997
KKC - 1997
Benjamin - 1997/98
Steve - 1998
Scott H - 1999
Ted - 2000
Tim Miller - 2000
Melonjr - 2000

Are you an RGVS All Star? If so, contact me and I'll add you to the list!